Injured Newborn to Adult

To Parents of a Child Who Was Injured

I'm sorry that your baby was injured at birth.

Mine was, too.

We weren't educated about this and had no idea that this could happen. What a shock it was when we saw the limp arm and we were given the standard "don't worry, it'll be fine soon".

Rather than saying "Welcome to Holland", (google that) I say to you

WELCOME TO REALITY

Guess what? YOUR REALITY is different than MINE and different than THEIRS.

There are NO individuals on earth who are the same.

There are NO injuries that are the same.

There are NO individuals who recover the same.

There are NO individuals who have the same result from the same ANYTHING.

So if 50 people online say that their children could do this or that and had no problem with it, your child may still not be able to do it. Don't assume anything. And don't think that if you push your child more, that they will be able to do it. This is not always about how much one tries - it can just be about whether or not it's actually possible.

Be careful with your child's self esteem. Self esteem is precious and can be easily shredded without you realizing that you are doing it.

BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE

This is not a time for guilt.

These struggles, as hard as they may be, create the WHO that WE ALL ARE.

This injury is permanent and life altering.

NOTHING is going to take this away. It will affect every aspect of your child: physical, structural, postural, energetic, psychological, emotional and spiritual.

YES, you can work hard and do every single thing you are told and supposed to do, but still each child has their own personal "line of recovery" and their own personal journey.

THANKFULLY, your child is WAY MORE than this injury.

Steer them to be the best person they can be and to achieve the most they can achieve. They need to know that they can become a fully functioning member of society who really feels good about themselves. Success and happiness can be achieved even with the most severe deficits and differences.

Help them come to know who they are WITH this injury.

Be honest and don't tell them that they can do anything they want, like anybody else, because it's just not true. For example, working against gravity may be ok for a short time but someone with this injury will probably not be able to sustain working against gravity, day in and day out, for years.

The best you can do is to help your child find resolution.

Teach them everything they need to know so that when they reach adulthood and leave your house, they know exactly how to keep their physical body intact.

It is this level of HONESTY

and working towards ACCEPTANCE

that will bring the INNER PEACE we all search and hope for.